Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Short... but not always sweet.

I've got to eat, so this won't be long, but I feel this needs to be said. I strongly believe that WHEN you stock the shelves with "make my PMS symptoms go away RIGHT NOW" pills that they should be stocked in a place that is EXTREMELY obvious. For example right AT THE FRONT DOOR so that women, such as myself, don't have to hunt around the store in the angry PMS induced RAGE that makes them want to throttle anyone who gets in their way with a bottle of "eaud de stinky headache inducer" that IS usually sold near the front of stores!!! Yes, Yes, I found them in the same aisle as all the other "gotta have because we don't really have a say in the matter" items, BUT they were in the middle...little colourful boxes mixed in and surrounded by other little colourful boxes making them HARD TO FIND which makes me cry...REALLY. But if you INSIST on putting them in an aisle with similar "oh this is best time of the month because it makes me SO SO SO HAPPY to be a woman" products surround them with BRIGHT LIGHTS! And WINE! We'd then be sure to find them with soothing, non yelling and throwing ease.

And that's all I have to say about that. Now DON'T BUG ME!!!

No, wait, one more thing...AND a bottle of "love...this won't hurt a bit as we trickle your anxiety away" remedy should be EASY to open!!! One should not have to damage their teeth or get out a hunting knife to pierce the shiny and impossible to get through seal of doom!!! Followed by (to quote the wonderful Dave Barry) "a piece of cotton the size of a small sheep". It's just plain MEAN to not have them easy to get at AFTER they've been hard to find. Actually, what they should do is have a lovely man servant waiting by the cash for you to pay for this "magic in a bottle" who will kindly open them for you with a smile, take 2 out for you (or however many you feel your "delightful mood" will need to disappear) and hand them to you with a glass of chilled sparking water for you to take them immediately and leave the store with a "smile". But don't forget the rest of those pills deary...you'll need them again soon....

Cin-ister thoughts be with you.

2 comments:

Tina said...

You really paint a picture! I felt like I was right there with you, angry and searching!

Sharleen said...

Hey Chickie!!! Hope you're feeling better!!! Love your thoughts ;) Good chuckle... Sharl