Monday, January 23, 2012

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 8

By Ms. Lee, Sponsored By The Ramblin’ Rule
Hello my dears.  I am back.  I hope you didn’t miss my insights too much in the two days I was absent from your lives. Day 6 and Day 7 passed by in a haze of “so much to do” and I’m afraid I was not able to find the time to put hands to keyboard.
But I must confess the lack of time was not our only enemy, for much like that famous Def Leppard Song “Love Bites” tendonitis in one’s hands does too bite.  And while the words may run almost constantly from my brain to my fingers and wait patiently for the tap of pain to be turned off long enough for me to bring you my quirky views on love to the page, the phrase “You need to rest your hands” uttered by my very kind Occupational Therapist, will flash before my eyes and force me to heed her advice; the column and the words, reluctantly, are set aside for another day. (And she’s right; I really do need to rest my hands more!)
What am I trying to say? I think we all know…I think stalling will only make it worse. As you have probably already guessed from my two day absence, I will have to continue not writing a daily love quote breakdown column for you my dears. Last weekend, in a fit of ambition, I said “Daily! Until the play “Defining Love” debuts at the Rodd Miramichi on February, 11th for the Hospice Miramichi Fundraiser!”  I hate to admit that I spoke too soon, but it is true. I will be unable to do so.
However, this is not the end. I will return when I can, when the hot pain of my thumbs takes a break for a while, and bring you a bit of insight to a few of the world’s most famous love quotes.  In the meantime, if there is a love quote that has been travelling through your brain trying to find itself a meaning, and you’d like some help, just drop it in the comment box of this, or one of my other columns, and much like the love that leaves one, but is meant to be and returns, the comment will find its way to me.
On that note, my patient readers, I would like to end today’s column, with not a famous love quote, but still, a famous quote, one that we all know: “Parting is such sweet sorrow”.
Sweet because the anticipation of returning to you with insight that could change the way you look at love is divine.  And the sorrow, well, sorrow is for the bruise on my soul at the loss of not being able to bring life changing advice to you all as often as I’d like to.  It hurts, more than I can put into words, but not as much as my hands.
Until next time, take solace that my public appearance at “A Taste of Chocolate” will in no way be hindered by the inconvenience of aching limbs.
Hopes to you for a lovely weekend,
Ms. Lee

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 5

By Ms. Lee, Sponsored By The Ramblin’ Rule

Hello all and welcome to day 5 of my love quote breakdown natterings.  I’m just waiting for my assistant to bring me her idea for today’s quote. Ah…here is she.
Really? This is what you think I should write about today?
“Your heart is my piñata”?
Well…ok…is this from something?  Chuck Palahniuk? The fellow who wrote “Fight Club”?
Hmm…I hope my assistant is not setting me up for a lawsuit and that the rules about fight club and their nonverbal agreements surrounding said club don’t apply to “love quotes”  by Mr. Palahniuk that can be found on the internet.
I need a few moments to think on this rather aggressive love quote.  Or perhaps I’m judging too quickly. The quote could be fluffy and light. It could mean that he would like to fill her heart, metaphorically, I hope, with sweets, fill it to the point of ridiculousness.  He would like his love to have a heart so candied that she will feel nothing but joy and saturated, syrupy happiness.  This confection coated heart will serve her well.  She will feel no pain at all, only her heart strings being pulled like saltwater taffy after she catches him with another girl and he gently explains to her that he is the kind of man that needs to be with more than one woman.
“Oh, I understand.” She’ll giggle, her candy heart beating too fast and loud to grasp the fact that she’s just accepted that her man cheats on her.
“I knew you would understand, because you’re just so sweet.” He’ll croon, as he runs his fingers through her cotton candy hair.
This could be one way of looking at this love quote.  I know you may be thinking that I’ve take the metaphor too far and perhaps I have.  But I’m working on an arbitrary deadline here and I really have to put down whatever comes to mind.
However, I think we need to examine what the meaning of this quote really is; he had rotten birthday parties as a child.
I know, from personal experience, nothing can be quite as exhilarating as taking a stick to a cardboard cartoon character and sending its contents and tissue papered exterior all over the floor. I also know that to be the child who has to watch the treats spill before she’s taken a baton to the candy housing creature, can be deflating.  The intense moment of taking a swing and a miss or even just grazing the piñata as you run frantically in the wrong direction because you are blind folded is a moment not easily replicated in life.  How often, as a child, will an adult give you a stick and purposely let you hit something with it? Not often and so if you miss your opportunity for violence in the name of birthday party shenanigans, your heart breaks a little.
It is in my “professional opinion” Mr. Palahniuk use of a heart = piñata metaphor can only mean one thing. I believe that there is a good chance that when he was a child, at all the birthday parties that were held in his honour, or that he attended where there was a piñata in the party game lineup, before he got a chance to bust open the donkey, or hippo that held the goods, a girl standing in the line ahead of him broke it open first.
So since then, this man, or perhaps it’s a “friend” he’s talking about, sees women as colourful, beautifully tissue papered piñatas he can fill to the brim with sweet nothings and then before they can say “Yea! Candy!” he leaves them broken hearted.
“In your face Donkey Pinata!” he screams to the heavens as he races away from the latest girl who sheds gum drop tears at his rejection, the latest girl who represents all the girls who stood between him and birthday party fun.
To wrap up this bit of love quote break down nonsense, I feel I must, rework the quote in my own special way.
“Thanks to never getting my turn at the piñatas at birthday parties, always missing out on the first dive for the loot and later getting in trouble for trying to reassemble the piñata so that I could finally take a crack at it in a fit of blind, zany wildness…getting in trouble because the party was long over and the time for being allowed to hit things with sticks in the house was long past and this behavior was no longer acceptable… thanks to this, your sweet loveable heart is mine for the breaking.  But to cushion the blow, I actually will give you candy because I don’t want you telling all your friends that I’m a total slime.”
Join me and my co-stars Jason and Lisa as we take you through all the trials and tribulations of finding that someone special to share your life with, on February, 11 at 7pm at the Rodd Miramichi River.
Sweet Dreams to you all,
Ms. Lee

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

"Defining Love": The Column, Day 4

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 4

By Ms. Lee, Sponsored By The Ramblin’ Rule
Good-day online community, I have returned with another love quote breakdown.  Remember folks, if there’s a quote you’d like to me shine my insightful light on, just drop it in the comment box and I’ll be happy to see what I can do to take you through the murky water of obscurity and into the twinkling pool of knowledge.
Today, I’d like to look at the quote “If I love you, what business is it of yours”.
This quote can be looked at from a couple of different angles. If you look at in a negative way, you can believe that this person, the speaker of the quote is involved with someone, but wants to withhold very important information that could aid in the progression of the relationship.  Perhaps he is not ready for the level of commitment that often comes with uttering those three loaded words.  He is not ready to look at rings and table settings at Tiffany’s. He knows that if he holds his feelings, close to his chest, this action will guarantee keeping the relationship on a steady incline of “maybe”; a place some people are perfectly comfortable staying at for years.
Or perhaps it’s something more than not having reached the emotional maturity to say “I love you”. Perhaps his is a spy and if he confesses to that someone that he is feeling the love, he may as well hand that person a big list of “why a spy in love is bad for the country.” The spy knows he may have to jet to some foreign land and infiltrate a group of badies who are set on doing something really nasty to the world such as flooding all major department stores with straight to DVD movies that no one will ever buy.  This is pure evil and an evil that he will not be able to vanquish if he has love on his mind.  So, he will remain cold, distant, never confess his love for you and because you are drawn, for some reason , to his brooding, mysterious side, you’ll stay, just in case he opens up to you one day and admits that he has “nothing but love for you.”
Now, let’s look at this quote in a positive light.  If you are friends, really good friends with someone and you love that friend, I mean really LOVE that friend, but you know he doesn’t feel the same way, it’s probably for the best if you never admit these feeling to this friend, never make it his business.  When you let the “big three words” out of the bag, it changes everything and if you share the “I love you” with the good friend who “loves you like a friend…or a like the pet iguana he had a lot of fun with as a child”, things will never be the same. Those three words will hang in the space between you like an awful smell or a giant, dancing elephant you can’t see around.  The friendship most likely wouldn’t survive the “I love you” bombshell and even though you may feel that you should put your heart on the line so that you won’t look back on  this time in 50 years and regret that you never found out if the feelings were mutual, don’t talk about them.   Instead, lock those feelings away and keep the friendship because believe me, no one needs to hear “I love you like I  loved my pet iguana” from anyone.
Of course, these are only my opinions, only the advice of someone who really only exists on paper and is only an expert about love on the stage. You can ignore both views on this quote and confess love to whomever you wish.
However, I still feel compelled to put a twist on the quote to make my breakdown clear. So here it is.
“If I love you, it may be your business, but I may take up a life embroiled in espionage at some point in the next twenty or thirty years (you know, while I still have my health) and therefore I can’t let a pesky thing like love get in the way of potential high action chases on a not fully constructed office tower nor can I risk admitting ‘I love you’ to someone who may only love me as much as he loved his favourite hamster ‘Mr. Biscuits’ so really, it’s none of your business”.
Yes, I like that quote much better.
If you feel my insights are off today, I promise they will be spot on at the Hospice Miramichi Fundraiser on February, 11/12 at 7pm at the Rodd Miramichi River. My friends and I are looking forward to taking you through the love our ages in “Defining Love”: The Play.
I remain as ever,
Ms. Lee

Monday, January 16, 2012

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 3

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 3

By Ms. Lee, Sponsored By The Rambling Rule

Hello one and all. It is I, Ms. Lee, (of “Defining Love”: the play) once again using The Rambling Rule’s generously donated cyberspace to help you through the layered and sometimes contrived world of love quotes.
Today we are going to examine a few lines from a very popular love song from the 1991 movie, Robin Hood, starring the delightful Alan Rickman.
What?  Sorry, excuse me… I was just passed a note from my assistant…Kevin Costner was the star? Really?  Ok, well if you say so.  I really only remember the sheriff.
So to continue, I’d like to examine just four short lines from the very popular love song “(Everything I do) I do it for you” By Bryan Adams. This song really brings back some happy memories for me. A few minutes ago, when I sat down at my computer to start writing about today’s quote, I got carried away on a flashback tangent and recalled all the Friday nights I would go to my friend’s place, we’ll call her K, and we would watch this video over and over.  More specifically, we would watch a series of videos that K taped off of Much Music.  We would moon over specific guys (and their long hair…it was the tail and of the 80′s hair metal era after all) and giggle when they would look at “us” from their music set world.
“Oh! I love the look on his face when he does that thing with his hair!”
“Me too! Rewind it so we can watch it again!”
Yes, it was a sweet time.  As I was sitting here, not writing, I remembered that one our favourites videos on the tape was Mr.Big’s “Be with you”; a lovely, heartfelt ballad, with great guitar and harmony.  When I hear that song blasting from my alarm clock after the 6:30 news, I am taken back to those Friday nights. So of course, instead of getting down to the business of writing, I had to look up the video and sing along.  Then I wondered “What has Mr.Big been up to? Are they still around?” And I have good news: they are.  In October 2010, they rocked out in Japan and I can tell you that the lead singer can still belt out “Be with you” with all the intensity I remember from the video. However, there are two things that stand out about “Mr. Big” that I hadn’t noticed until today:
1.) The lead singer kind of looks like Bjork (you know, the famous Icelandic singer of the Swan Dress)
2.) The drummer is pretty hot.
But I digress. Let me get back to my professional self and work on breaking down a few of the lines from that Robin Hood love tune.
The lines I’d like to look at are:
There’s no love, like yo love
And no other, could give mo love
There’s nowhere, unless yo there
All the time, all the way, yeah.

When the mood strikes and my star sign is in the house of Saturn I have been known write a song or two and so I understand the desire to want to get just the right rhyme, but why did Bryan Adams write Yo love, Mo love? It’s a bizarre way to get a point across and not at all romantic!
Sorry, excuse me again…my assistant who is hovering over my shoulder and making sure I get this done before I go for coffee is passing me another note…
Really? The lyrics are not Yo and Mo? They are Your and More?  Well, that makes more sense!  So why didn’t he just say that? OH…he is…I’m hearing it wrong. Thank-you for the correction. I suppose then this means he’s say Your there and not Yo there? Ah ok…it’s just a problem with his annunciation… or my hearing. Oh dear, where is a towel to wipe the egg off my face?
Well, everyone is wrong from time to time, even me. Let us move on now.
The last line of this lyrical section that I’d like to examine is:  All the time, all the way, yeah.
You may be wondering what this line means and I wish that I had a clear way to break this down for you, but for the last 20 years, I have not been able to define the line to myself in a way that makes sense.  I understand the love; he loves her a lot, she returns the love in an appropriate manner that satisfies like no other, there’s no one else in the world like her, life is vague and empty, sort of a nowhere land when she’s not around, but what does the last line mean? Is she always around? All the time, all the way? Perhaps this means she’s in his way, all the time and although he’s got love for her, MO LOVE than he ever thought he could have for another, she’s becoming distracting. Yes, I think that’s exactly right.  I think I’ve finally cracked the code on this lyrical mystery.
Now to wrap up, let me see what spin I can put on this love quote, to make it even clearer to you all.
No one in the world loves me like you do
My life is an empty chasm of cold, inky darkness when you’re not around
And yet, at the same time, you’re always here and I could really use a little space
Thank-you for walking down memory lane with me.  I hope to see you all learning about love and its complexities at the Hospice Fundraiser at the Rodd on February 11 at 7pm.

Best wishes for a happy day,

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 2

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day 2

By Ms. Lee, Sponsored by The Rambling Rule

Hello all and welcome to day two.  When I rose this this morning from a fairly decent sleep ( Although I should really rethink watching CSI until one am) I checked my email to find that I had a comment regarding my first article from  a Rose-Marie about roses.  If you recall from yesterday’s column I had said that if there was a quote you would like me to break down for you, to simply deposit it in the comment box.  Rose-Marie did just the thing.  Thank-you for the comment Rose-Marie and now let’s see what I can do to shed some light on your love quote which is:
“A life with love must have some thorns, but a life without love can have no roses.”
Ah yes; that old yarn. This quote reminds me of that love ballad by one of those hair bands back in the 80′s. You probably recall the song, no? I believe it is called “Every rose has its thorn.”  The singer, I believe is talking about love much in the same way Rose-Marie’s suggested love quote is; love, although beautiful  is painful.  You must take the good with the bad. However the song also goes on to say that “Just like every night has its dawn.” Which isn’t such a bad thing and to my mind means all things come to an end which isn’t the same thing at all. And furthermore, the singer goes on to drone “Just like every cowboy sings a sad, sad song.”  This, to me adds confusion to a metaphorically driven metal tune.  Why is this cowboy singing sad, sad song?  Is he singing because love is beautiful, yet painful? Or is he singing because the dawn is coming and as the sun peaks its head over then rocky horizon he will have to draw pistols against his arch foe who was once his closest ally?
The song is unfortunately unclear.
And the song was made even more unclear to me when I heard Bret Michaels, the singer of the famous ballad, rasp out a reworked version of it to Regis during “Good-bye Regis week”.  (I didn’t even know Regis was retiring and only found out because I had the information forced upon my knowledge base in my Dr.’s waiting room. Sad to see Regis go… I guess…I’ve only watched the show MAYBE five times in the thirty years he was on the show and therefore have no real feelings for his departure.)
So, to get back to my story, Kelly calls out “Please welcome Bret Michaels who is here to sing his hit song ‘Every Rose Has Its Thorn’.” Mr. Michaels comes out, guitar in hand, says some nice words about Regis and then he says “Here’s the song with new lyrics for Regis”. You could feel the audience’s collective gasp. This is not what they had expected! At his announcement of his reworked song I thought of two things at once:
1. “I’d really like to leave because this will probably be painful” and
2. “He’s going to Weird Al his own song.”
The second thought did not come true. Weird Al would be ashamed. The lyrics were in no way a parody of the original song, it actually sounded like he was making them up as he went along, and the tune not so much like the original but more like he was ripping off his original tune. Or maybe he’d forgotten the original tune, but just soldiered on anyway. Whatever the case, my first thought was correct; it was painful. Even Regis looked like he wished that someone would pull the plug on his show immediately so that he could go throw himself off the back of his couch rather than be forced to listen to a specially “written” version of the 80′s hair metal ballad of roses, the dawn and sad cowboys.
I believe that this is a good place to tie your sent in love quote Rose-Marie.  Much like love you can’t have celebrity status without battling your way through a wall of thorns from time to time, but also like love, you can’t be a celebrity without roses.  Dozens and dozens of roses that are sent to you your dressing room daily by adoring fans and desperate stalkers.
Thank-you for the quote Rose-Marie I hope I helped you understand your chosen love quote a little better and to my other readers, remember to feel free to drop a quote in the comment box. I’ll do my best to shed light on the complexities of love.
The live version of my insights is only 27 sleeps away!
Thank-you for reading,
Ms. Lee

“Defining Love”: The Column, Day One

“Defining Love”:  The Column, Day One

By Ms. Lee (Sponsored By The Rambling Rule)

Hello all and welcome to my four week guest spot on Miramichi Online. I will be appearing in a play at the Rodd Miramichi River on February 11th as part of a Hospice Miramichi Fundraiser and Cindy Rule (AKA the Rambling Rule) graciously offered me the use her cyberspace as a way of promotion and to allow me to have a place to air my thoughts about love. After all, since my role in “Defining Love: the play” is that of a lecturer who heavily researched the topic of love (for an hour least) and has lived a life full of heartbreak and heartbreaking, it really only makes sense that I may have the knowledge base to wax beyond the production and help shed light on the mysteries of love.
My plan over the next four weeks is to take love quotes and break them down for you.  What is on the surface of a quote such as “I love you” may not be the full story. I feel that as an “expert” in the field of love I can help shed light on the obscure meanings below the simple words and make the quote and its lesson accessible to you all.
So let’s get started.
The first quote that I’d like to look at is “Love means nothing in tennis and everything in life.”
Ok, so right off the top, a falsehood. I’ve played tennis, and took lessons once upon a time and while I may not have been the best player (unless it is a good thing to say I was the best of the worst) I know that while “love in tennis” may literally mean nothing as in “zero”, it means something to the person who has a score of “love”.  It means that they are not “in the zone” or they keep “dropping the ball” or letting the ball rush by them like a tribble on a mission, which results in getting no results point wise and landing a in a score of “love”.
It is sad really, that the word “love”, a word that when spoken by the right person can fill you with a sense of life, would be used in such a derogatory way; what a racket.
Let us move on to the second half of the quote “and everything in life”. While the first half fills me with memories of being a bit of a loser, the second half smacks me in the face with its presumptuous quality. To say that “love” (and we’ll assume that the one who penned this phrase was speaking of romantic love) is “everything in life” is basically saying that all and sundry assume that if you do not have someone special to share your life with, that you don’t have romantic love, well…you might as well just hang your head in shame.  Do you have friends that care about you? Big deal! Do you have self-respect and a feeling of purpose in the world that replaces needing to have a partner?  You must be delusional! Do you have a job you love? So what! Your job doesn’t tuck you in at night and love you even when you wake up with pillow marks all over your rumpled face!
This part of the quote seems to be saying that romantic love is a goal that should be achieved. It heavily implies that this kind of love will fill all the gaps in your life that are empty because of the lack of it. It is basically telling you that without life “love” much like scoring “love” in tennis; it is nothing.
I think that it is an unfair quote and would like to give you, as an ending to my first column, my own reworked version.
“Love is nothing in tennis, which only matters if you are highly competitive or a professional tennis player in which case if you keep getting love in tennis perhaps you should rethink your career path, and everything in life UNLESS you know that life can be fulfilling even without romantic love and can always be replaced with the heavenly confection know as chocolate.”
Yes, that’s much better.
So, I hope you enjoyed my first “Defining Love” column. I will be back soon with another love quote interpretation for you all.
If you have a love quote that you would like dissected or broken down into simple terms for you, please put your idea in the comment box.
And remember for a life version of my insights, I hope you’ll come on down to the fundraiser for Hospice Miramichi “A Taste of Chocolate” on February 11th at 7:00pm.  For information, please this link.
Thank-you for your time,
Ms. Lee.

Hospice Miramichi Presents: A Taste of Chocolate

Hello Everyone
Those of you who are fans of my blog or those of you who just find yourselves here from time to time, I also have a column with a local online newspaper. I don't post on my blog as much as I should so for the next while I'm double dip so to speak. Whatever I put on Miramichi Online, will now go on my blog.  I'm not sure if it serves a greater purpose. I just feel like putting my work in more place than one.

Right now is a very busy time for me. I'm directing and acting in a play that I wrote.  My friends Lisa and Jason are in it with me and we're proud that it is going to part of a Hospice Miramichi Fundraiser.  We hope that  lot of people will come out to see it and give their hard earned money to a very worthy and much needed cause.

Here is the first of my month long columns that I'm writing to help promote "A Taste of Chocolate".

Hospice Miramichi Presents: A Taste of Chocolate

If you love chocolate, laughing, music and helping out in your community, then there’s a good chance that you’ll be heading to the Rodd Miramichi River on Saturday, February 11th, 2012 at 7pm
“A Taste of Chocolate” is returning to the Rodd as a fundraiser for Hospice Miramichi. Below is some information about Hospice Miramichi from their website.
   “Hospice Miramichi is a non-profit volunteer organization and was established in March 2011. The focus of hospice care is on comfort not cure, and on life not death. Hospice Miramichi is seeking to raise awareness of the unique needs of those who are living with life threatening illnesses where cure is not an option and medications are no longer controlling the illness. Hospice Miramichi will work within the community by providing services and support for clients and families within their homes. Our volunteers will be trained to provide practical and emotional support during the end stages of life and through the grieving process.
   Our plan is to bring hospice to Miramichi in three (3) stages. First, the establishment of a Hospice Outreach Program, where in- home support services will be offered to assist palliative patients and their families live the remainder of their lives to the fullest extent possible. The second stage of our plan will be the addition of a Hospice Day Program . The third stage of our plan is to establish a Residential Hospice (RH) in Miramichi within the next 3-4 years.”
Turning this much needed organization into reality requires community help and “A Taste of Chocolate” is just one of the fundraisers that Hospice Miramichi will be presenting this year. They are hoping the turnout at these events will reflect the huge amount of support the Miramichi community and beyond has already shown Hospice Miramichi.
Along with mountains of delicious chocolate desserts (and non-chocolate treats if chocolate isn’t your thing), you will be treated to an original one act play written by yours truly, Cindy Rule, called “Defining Love.”  Lisa Savage, Jason Blanchard and I will entertain you as we take you through the different stages of love; from childhood crushes to finding that special someone, we believe the play is filled with moments everyone can relate to.
The evening will also include music by Connie and Paul as well as an Arm’s Length Auction, Cake Auction and a 50/50 draw.
So, once again, the event details are…
Hospice Miramichi Presents
A Taste of Chocolate
Saturday, February 11, 2012 at 7pm at the Rodd Miramichi River.
Featuring the Crule Players in the original one act play
“Defining Love.”
And the music of Connie and Paul
Tickets are $25 and are available at Saltwater Sounds, Bill’s Quik Way and The Books Inn.

For more information about this event please call 625-2153.
Or email
For more information about Hospice Miramichi please go to

Thank-you for your support and we hope to see you there!
Cindy Rule